ho<3me

how to you go back to a place you call home,
when it doesnt stand for what it means,
or was anymore.

not because everyone's grown older,
but more seemingly so, grown out of each other
in ways i can never comprehend;
how it happened, and why.
and what's next and what will be left.

i thought the aftermath has gone, clearly mistaken.
the repurcussions seem worse
just when i thought we were going good.

for now, i'll just try and hold on
to those that still keep the walls of home standing.
i feel so selfish, wanting what i want.
when deep down all i wanted was to make you proud,
and happily carefree, someday for a long long time.
so mum, i'm coming home.
and we'll weather it through together.

hold your own, and everything will be just fine, in time.
i just wished, as always, i had answers for everything to make sense.
and to still make me believe in things that makes ur heart tingle.
and i just want to scream and know
that you will hear my pent up emotions for once.