denial

so i survived a 6 day work week.

monday the usual routine,
and met danny with intentions for kebabs.
then met rachel, tim, agnes, wei kiat and muna, and ended up at pasta mania.
did i mention, danny and i are on our food quest for all the various food cravings we're having.
so far, we've done the sushi, the pasta, the salmon sandwich, even carl's jr.
hokkien mee too and laksa on seperate occasions.
next up is his bar chor mee, prawn noodles and fish and co.
recipe for a reserved position as prop.
i love haagen daz ice cream!

tuesday, routine repeated, with a few meetings.
wednesday had an event which i was involved,
i LOVE the walkies. its too cool.
the earpiece to the ear, sweeeeeeeeet
the colleagues dont say it but i know, they loved my chinese song i sang over it.
*wink*
and i swear scandinavian men are mostly carbon copies,
at least for the old foggies.
blonde hair, fair, blue eyes, sharp nose, receeding hairline.
and they're so cheeky!
one of em went into the lift, and ran back passing me him name badge
"keep this in memory of me darlin"
and another while i was escorting them into their bus
"arnt u gon hold my hand sweetheart?"
haaaaaaaaaa.
ultimate backache after long hours of standing please.

thursday short hours in the office, because of on-site briefing for the weekend at one15 marina.
i swear the marina is so luxurious,
its like a dream.
the pool area, the private dining lounge. too perfect.
thats the defination of lifestyle of the rich and famous.
i want.
and the boats, lovely.
the view, awesome.
the serenity, priceless.
the steph, dreaming.

friday was mundane, and a slight jolt of looking forward to a break on the weekend/sunday.
saturday early in the morning to sentosa.
gosh, i went to the single unisex toilet and to my horror,
this guy was taking a shit, NAKED!
god, for fuck's sake, lock the freaking toilet.
and why naked?
kept seeing him throughout the day as well,
talk about awkward, he was the conceirge, and he even called a cab for me.
surprised i recognised you with your clothes on aie?

headed to bq after.
nothing like a cold beer and good rugby on tv.
pierre lost his bet and had to walk around barefooted,
though he cheated and short lived it by going home.
PFFFT.
mos with shawn and danny, bumped into chris there.
not on top form you were, well and then neither was i.
emptiness.
i just wished my saturday ended better though.
i need comfort.
waking up on sunday feels tiring.
dont help the boss calls at noon with things for you to see to.

"Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass.
And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim.
The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon.
We can only lie to ourselves for so long.
We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth.
Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world.
Head on, guns blazing.
De Nile (denial).
It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean.
So how do you keep from drowning in it?"

i'm not the sort who has the right words or actions for everything.
and i just wished i knew how to make it simple for you to see, hear, feel and understand,
every single thing that is running through my mind and churning in my heart,
only when it comes to you.