mellon cherry home coming.

i'm finally back!

from the late nights in the office up till 530 am,
to the asean summit itself.
i'm free, and tired.

and i somehow wanted to stay awhile longer,
because the thought of going back to nothing,
makes me feel like nothing.
its a different hurt in the bottom of my heart.

doesnt help that xmas is coming.
the warm and fuzzy cant help but overwhelm me,
followed by a hard fought battle of shrugging it away.
i hate disappointments that's borne upon hope.

on the other hand, i loved coming back to the empty shangri-la apartment.
its my kinda place. a quiet at the end of my day.
my time, with a nice bath and a cuppa tea.
spongebob makes me laugh.

and at this moment in time,
i can't have this wait out much longer.
i want to be in that craddle,
i know i've got so much more to give.

for now, i'll just look for travel company.
for my short beach getaway the coming week hopefully,
and for my around the world in 80 days cum end feb.
to get my mind and heart of things hopefully.

my letter to you II

dear you,

i feel each step your taking,
further and further into the rehlm in which i can't comprehend.
i'm slowly knowing less and less of you.
i can't paint your picture beside me anymore.

and i really feel, like i'm losing my best friend.
it looks as though, you're letting go.
and if its real, then i don't want to know.
don't tell me coz it hurts.

the mile i'm willing to run looks cloudier by the day,
the reason slowly fading away.
do you realise i'm still here?
or do i realise, that perhaps you're not mine?

i'm scared to dial the phone, afraid to fall asleep.
because with you, anticipation is all i have;
and it usually follows by disappointment, empty castles in my sky.
its the gratification i can't live without, only coz its you.

and as always, in my good times and bad,
i wish you were here.

love,
still me.

expectations

We all think we're going to be great

and we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren't met.

But sometimes our expectations sell us short.

Sometimes the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected.

You got to wonder why we cling to our expectations,

because the expected is just what keeps us steady.

Standing. Still.

The expected's just the beginning,

the unexpected is what changes our lives.

=)

and theres nothing left to say,
when i dont know you anymore,
and the best thing left that i can do,
is smile and pretend everything's a-ok
while walking away.

'once' and 'always' don't go together,
i should know.
especially when fate and decisions arnt in your hands,
and when you try, insufficiently.
its so easy to know where you're needed vs wanted.

i just don't know how much further in the corner i can be pushed in.
i don't like the way my feelings are dealt with.
its just pointless, trying to convince myself.
la la la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaa la la

just do whatever you're happy about.
maybe, its just me.
but you, you could have fought harder to be there,
in the way i needed you to be.

perhaps its no ones fault,
no one can take the blame.
but things, outcomes, situations and feelings,
could have been managed so much better.
unless this is safely the best, the only and the last resort.

i'm slowly learning how to have zero expections;
from me, or anyone.
its a wonder how i'm not already use to it,
almost as if im hoping for pigs to fly and cows to fall from the sky.

crappy scrappy weekend

and the best thing about the weekend,
was the sun.

i can't stand the sound of silence.

after a whole week of mad working since 7am in the morning,
i'd think i'd be thankful for the weekend.
esp with the scc 7s as well.
but no.
my weekend was quite shitty.

other then my moments with shimona at haji lane
and sharing a banana spilt with her after saturday's rugby.
and aruging with hadi in the car bacause he wouldnt stop making me feel worse.
to the mexican lunch for rachel's 20th
and laughing at silly rugby players making the most of the 1hr rain.

i somehow wished things were different,
though i know there's nothing i can change.
or maybe i can change me,
coz i think there's something wrong.
things don't always look up for me,
they dont go in my favour.

and i think i deserve better then this,
at least whatever i'm being dealt now;
the way i'm treated by you -
that of which i'll never come to understand.

at least try to see how i'm coping in such a circumstance,
and get to know the person you'd never come to see.
because i'm better then that.

its not like i havn't, tried and tried.
i've been keeping clear, of stepping on the cracks.
missed just enough to keep me coming back.
oh i've waited for better angels

better late then not at all.
better to make the break, then to take the fall
i wouldnt mind hanging on,
if i could find out what i'm hanging from.

still hoping better angels come to me,
it's a woman's worth.

and there is no medication for the soul.

and so far.

i've never tried as hard before to hold back my tears.
too many things at once.
i want to run away, with nowhere in mind.
the thought of running nowhere's becoming so much more appealing then the here and now.

i don't like the way things are turning out,
i don't want to be a bad person.
and i don't like it even more that there's absolutely nothing;
and nothing i can do about it.

i wish you'd realise the abuse you put me through.
the way you speak to me, belittling.
the way you look at me, as if all you see is what's in front of you,
minus a beating heart, and real emotions.

i'm only human; a struggling one,
with too heavy a load on my shoulders that i can't take for long.
there's so much dwelled up in my mind and heart and eyes.
i never figured me as one to be a quitter.

i've always hated dragging my feet.
i'm hating having too much to hate.
why i ever this hateful?

i need devine intervention,
or just support and a comforting warmth would be nice,
and assurance that somehow, things are alright.
that i'll be alright.
or just everything'll be alright.
teach me how.




so far, this is the worse i've ever been.

your winter

The grey ceiling on the earth
Well it's lasted for a while
Take my thoughts for what they're worth
I've been acting like a child

In your opinion, and what is that?
It's just a different point of view
What else, what else can't I do?

I said I'm sorry, yeah I'm sorry.
I said I'm sorry ,but what for?
If I hurt you then I hate myself
Don't want to hate myself, don't want to hurt you

Why do you choose your pain?
If you only know how much I love you

I won't be your winter
I won't be anyone's excuse to cry
We can be forgiven
I will be here

A frozen image of ourselves
Innocent and in a trance
A dance that lasted for a while

You read my eyes just like your diary,
oh remember, please remember

Well, I'm not a beggar, but what's more
If I hurt you, then I hate myself,
And I don't wanna hate myself, don't wanna hurt you

If you only knew how much


and i had a dream about you.
i'm good to go away now.
i hate not knowing,
and then knowing, its not.

i miss you so.

brazilian thread.

i loved my monday.
work was slow but enough to get me by.
met shawn for dinner,
right after my bus blunder.
took 196 and didnt know where the bloody hell to alight.
went all the way to kallang or something, where i just alighted coz i saw plenty of cabs on the opposite side.
and alas, the overhead bridge was under construction so no way of getting across the massive traffic.
so just took a cab down, waited quite abit.
headed to marina to meet shawn and bought him dinner.
thai dinner was great, i always love our conversation.
the food was a little too spicy, i swear there was a small flame.
walked around, bought myself a book called "blink",
recommended by shawn, about people and first impressions.
can't wait to get to it.
also the notebook that i've always fancied, as well as a cd
which i thought i'd take a chance with coz i only loved one song.
(turns out i dont really fancy the album!)
shawn bought us ice creams, god was i stuffed!!
home it was and bumped into marli on the train.

tuesday morning i woke up feeling horrid, so i went back into bed,
but still pre occupied with work
till about noonish, i got out to get my mc,
and decided to do all my errands that i dont normally have time to do coz of work.
met lu at 2.30, she was late.
thus giving me the time to spend freaking $123 on personal items from watsons.
and to orcahrd we went, coz we wanted to get a brazilian.
i think i have a high tolerance of pain,
not too surprising when it came to me i guess.
but yeah, gosh the wax felt warm, and the lady was so friendly.
anyway, mine was done in a flash, hurt a minimal, and i was sweating. ha.
then went on to thread my brows.
it doesnt look at all bad, made it much neater,
but i just freaked out when she did the top part of the brows,
coz i always left it untouched, coz i just do. and well, bye bye :(
lu went for the brazilian, and gosh, everyone had a good giggle with her reactions.
he YEEEEOUCHes, and OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH!!!! haha.
she still perks my day up, always.
walked around, and i managed to get the cd changed.
diana krall it was.
met a few of the interns at the singapore visitor centre in their so kung-fu-ish uniforms,
poor haha, hang in there darlin! and samuel, you learn kung-fu kuku bird? :)
and i bought a pair of sunnies!
jean-luc suddenly called me and i immediately spotted him across the road.
silly man.
met shimo, and went for training.

training was good, my legs are so sleepy its almost hard to move em.
the freshies this year are zzz. no comment.
i guess everyone starts off like that, but its just a different amount they are willing to put in,
which translates into the message of a very minimal amount they expect to get out.
and because of me being half blind with no contact lenses on,
and the damn astro turf being poorly lit,
and a super hard steeden and a shitty pass,
that somehow hit my fingertips,
and my middle finger became purple for abit, and hurt for alot.
so much for high tolerance of pain.
now its just swollen and hurts with minute movements.
game time was orgasmic;
i still have my fitness in me under the layers of blabber,
lasted quite abit at quite a pace (then again its night so not too reliable, but whatever)
and best when i scored on the restart, straight run for the tri line.
and the bestest is the somewhat double loop on the wing side, resulting on a 3 on 1!
it was fuckin awesome, made my effort of coming down all fuckin worth it.
tho i hate hate hate shouting at people coz they're just blatantly not making effort.
not too surprised but quite upset knowing that its prolly inevitable that some people might think i'm a bitch.
ho hum.
i particularly loved seeing marian, suria, ruby and of corse shimo.
not to mention play with all of them .
left early coz i just couldnt stay.

so now i'm home, with my nachos on the side,
after a nice long warm bathe,
i feel so fresh and clean.
and a useless middle finger and a still achy breaky back,
and a freaking hole in my freakin wallet.
there goes my first pay cheque! literally, swear. within 2 days.
kiss goodbye.


i keep your messages, to remind me of the person you are,
and the person you make me to be.
maybe it'll be different.
and maybes gone too far.

denial

so i survived a 6 day work week.

monday the usual routine,
and met danny with intentions for kebabs.
then met rachel, tim, agnes, wei kiat and muna, and ended up at pasta mania.
did i mention, danny and i are on our food quest for all the various food cravings we're having.
so far, we've done the sushi, the pasta, the salmon sandwich, even carl's jr.
hokkien mee too and laksa on seperate occasions.
next up is his bar chor mee, prawn noodles and fish and co.
recipe for a reserved position as prop.
i love haagen daz ice cream!

tuesday, routine repeated, with a few meetings.
wednesday had an event which i was involved,
i LOVE the walkies. its too cool.
the earpiece to the ear, sweeeeeeeeet
the colleagues dont say it but i know, they loved my chinese song i sang over it.
*wink*
and i swear scandinavian men are mostly carbon copies,
at least for the old foggies.
blonde hair, fair, blue eyes, sharp nose, receeding hairline.
and they're so cheeky!
one of em went into the lift, and ran back passing me him name badge
"keep this in memory of me darlin"
and another while i was escorting them into their bus
"arnt u gon hold my hand sweetheart?"
haaaaaaaaaa.
ultimate backache after long hours of standing please.

thursday short hours in the office, because of on-site briefing for the weekend at one15 marina.
i swear the marina is so luxurious,
its like a dream.
the pool area, the private dining lounge. too perfect.
thats the defination of lifestyle of the rich and famous.
i want.
and the boats, lovely.
the view, awesome.
the serenity, priceless.
the steph, dreaming.

friday was mundane, and a slight jolt of looking forward to a break on the weekend/sunday.
saturday early in the morning to sentosa.
gosh, i went to the single unisex toilet and to my horror,
this guy was taking a shit, NAKED!
god, for fuck's sake, lock the freaking toilet.
and why naked?
kept seeing him throughout the day as well,
talk about awkward, he was the conceirge, and he even called a cab for me.
surprised i recognised you with your clothes on aie?

headed to bq after.
nothing like a cold beer and good rugby on tv.
pierre lost his bet and had to walk around barefooted,
though he cheated and short lived it by going home.
PFFFT.
mos with shawn and danny, bumped into chris there.
not on top form you were, well and then neither was i.
emptiness.
i just wished my saturday ended better though.
i need comfort.
waking up on sunday feels tiring.
dont help the boss calls at noon with things for you to see to.

"Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass.
And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim.
The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon.
We can only lie to ourselves for so long.
We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth.
Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world.
Head on, guns blazing.
De Nile (denial).
It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean.
So how do you keep from drowning in it?"

i'm not the sort who has the right words or actions for everything.
and i just wished i knew how to make it simple for you to see, hear, feel and understand,
every single thing that is running through my mind and churning in my heart,
only when it comes to you.

my day with kyle.

the week went by so quickly,
too quickly.
i barely had time to stop.

lazy sundays have to be the best.
this weekend's a sober one,
no reserved hang over day for me this not so sunny sunday.

and i loved my day spent with kyle.
just in bed, watching him.

the best thing i love about kyle,
is his innocence,
and how his eyes translate 'sincerity' in so many levels,
its a calming.
he's perfect.
his sexy green eyes,
with his i-wanna-run-my-fingers-through-his-nice-brown-hair,
his geeky sunshine of a smile.
like a cut and paste of a perfect face.

i feel like a stupid school girl.


you're too gorgeous kyle.
i prefer you to matt dallas.


i wouldn't hold the umbrella for you though.
you hold it for me.



and you're the perfect persona of what the 'baby boy' look is like.
or even, the goofy-i-wanna-pinch-your-cheeks look.


and i'm lovin' it! :)
my sunday would have been snorsville without you kyle xy.



and i hope you realise,
that that was your last.
because i cannot wait for you anymore.
time's not a luxury i have or you'll get,
neither does the storm in my heart.
that was my goodbye.

i had a dream last night.

oh how much i miss you.

i really do.

monday blues.

monday was alright.
time passed slowly, at first.
i cant complain,
i had more going on in my mind then in the office.
manning phone lines is weeeeeeeeeeh.
that was till work started piling.
2 differnt tasks.
am i weird that that made me excited and perked my day up?
haha.
possible overseas project? PLEASE!
stayed in the office till 7 plus ah! madness!

bussed to commonwealth to wait for stupid hadi,
who made me wait forever.
his new bike's more comfy, shorter (coz he said i was heavy, bitch)
plus! the box behind is a good back rest. so, me li-ke.
went for the geyland bazaar thing. i hate that place because it makes me wanna eat ALOT.
bumped into emily there, she just got in from england.
went to the hawker centre for food, i swear he just eats chilli soaked rice
and the main dish is the chilli.
walked somemore, i want a swift!
got more food (aiyo)
and HADIZAN, you didnt bank in my cheque!
to think everyday i checked my account, and you banked in yours! thanks.
he refused to give me the cheque to bank in because he didnt want me to see his handwritting.
sometimes, boys are so matured.
some gay dude touched his bum,
and then i walked into a damn maniquin! thanks.
in my defense, it walked into me and held my hand.
going home time plus hunting for a cheque deposit box.
stopped at kembangan, but NOPE, none there.
and we missed the one at bedok,
so we just used simei one, and at all occasions,
he refused to let me drop it, and he'd rather settle his bike, walk there, and drop it,
JUST SO I WONT SEE HIS HANDWRITTING.
geeeesh.
home sweet home all tired and all.
i'm glad i had the night out,
could sure do with more even though i'm tired.
you make me laugh la hadi.

tuesday was just none stop typing with the icy fingers.
excel sheet, research yadder.
didnt help that the server was down from 3 onwards!
couldnt finish what was due that day!
so i had to bring it home! :(
and to think i took my training stuff out,
i had to go home! i was too tired and it was too late.
i surely miss the girls, and playing with them! :(
i need affirmation back in my life!

for now, i'll just stick to my security blanket,
my favourite brown duvet.
but now i have stupid curtains coz the usual ones are in the wash.
note to self: ikea soon please!

weishemohuaizheyang

i'm not ok,
and you're not helping,
i dont know why.
maybe to you it just is, and will remain as nothing.

and i'm near the point where i don't care,
because you don't either.
that was your chance to say at least something,
but you left me hanging, again.

i can't wait this one out,
not because i don't want to, but i just cannot.
i'm too distracted and lost.
yes, lost; for words, thoughts and emotions.

i'm tired of trying to figure this whole thing out.
its weighing on my shouders and pushing me against the wall of nails.
i think i'm alone on this,
can't you just meet me halfway?

now just really, what the fucking ever.
its gone through my head enough.
i really thought i read you like a book,
i was darn sure i did.
turns out you're not the person i know you are.

whatever comes, it couldnt be any worse.
given the chance, i'll do it all again.
and things will just never be the same.
i won't be.

and i just want to see you.

love,
samantha.

whatever

my weekend went alright.

started off friday meeting daniel.
had carl's jr for dinner, and thats the furthest i've ever been with their burgers!
off to clarke quay coz danny needed to drop off posters and what not,
mohd sultan area-ish too. then it was off to dempsey road.
chels and lester had their malibu party thing they ran,
by the time we got there the free drinks ended. thanks.
but we did get one, and god was it awful! HAHA .
the belly dancer was fcuking hot! i think justin timberlake's song 'sexy back' was sung for her.
anyway, heicienda is a nice place, we sat at the bottom grassy patch.
till about 11 we left, headed to dxo for the $20 towers.
rachel and mai joined us after their shift.
and we profitted $10. :)
more food at makansutra next door, we were just being greedy i swear.
$8 hokkein meeeeeeeeeeeee. and then a slow long walk to bq for the england vs south africa game.
maximum we gave england a score of 3 off a penalty conversation.
but they disappointed us futher. a big fat ZERO.
not that i care, i'm for the south africa side,
and percy, you're too fine. you sure know how to kick some balls.
thanks jean luc for the ride back.

struggled to wake up the next day.
i need and want more sleep! :(
off to turf city for some touch.
i really miss playing with the tpiranhas.
and i enjoyed my quiet time.
off to yck with bird to catch the match and shower,
bucks won both games.
then to boat quay for dinner at macs, and for the mc flurry craving,
which i only had all but half since it started to rain and it was cold.
plus, ice cream dont go very much with beer.
caught the wales and aussie game,
pierre attempted 'extreme entertainment'.
rachel and mai came along and off to mos we went.
it was alright. mr german with the tie, your my favourite.
and i think its a macho issue where guys just dont want to spin.
frenchie boy alexis bought us shots, some funky red ones actually,
which i didnt drink! too scary.
moreso i kinda already had enough shots, complementary of 'skinny'
half the time i didnt really know what the hell i was drinking also.
bumped into becs and lena there.
daniel came along, met raymond and andy,
who bought more drinks. yikes.
stayed till lights came on, and to smoove till it closed too,
and off to breakfast we went!
mai and myself had so much fun splatting our faces onto the glass as people walked by.
its funny seeing how different people react.
and i just couldnt sleep.

woke up, the sister and the bf ordered macs.
so much for my swaering off junk food,
i had it all weekend!
put a dvd on and basically enjoyed my 'free time'
surprised i wasnt a wee bit hungover.
laksa craving taken care of during dinner. so that made me happy,
until the feeling of being stuffed settled in.
caught saw III online, it was gross! but the story line was good.
and you, it wasnt the best the way you treat me like dirt.

i can't stand your indiffrence towards me, and how i'm just a no one.
i'm not asking for much, but i think i deserve more then what i'm getting now.
its a different kind of hurt.
and yet, i'm not surprised, coming from you.
because you don't realise, and probably never will.

i'm not so much looking forward to my week of nothing.
and i can't stand too many bad days.
argh!

swell

so the internship started.
and so far, i'm lovin it!


on my first day, it was a nice welcome,
turns out andrew knows my course manager!
which makes it so intimidating!
the people here are so friendly and nice.
i feel bad that i just cannot absorb so many names at once.
i have my own desk, in this place known as the fish bowl,
where the 2 other interns from nanyang sit as well.
we are the fishies in the bowl!
i got the chance to be attached to this way cool assignment,
to observe the do's and how's of getting a event on the way.
helped out and saw how they put together their pitch presentation.
mad rush i swear, and sanjay wanted to bring me along to the pitch,
WOO HOO.
and AND, since i hadnt had lunch, he told me to eat his!
awkward, but oh well.
drove over to the building (2 blocks down)
sanjay drives madly i swear, and a lizard didnt let me into the car.
the meeting took a good 4.5 hrs!
got back to the office by like 6.25, left 20mins after.
that was my swell, first day. me li-ke.

2nd day, i didnt have much to do really.
there was a general meeting in the morning,
and i met the big boss himself.
after introductions, the interns were excused to carry on.
all i had was just to finish up the invoices that i helped kamala with.
and i was done for the day, kinda.
by the time the meeting ended it was lunch time.
so off to opposite with some of the girls to satidfy my chicken rice craving! :)
my tongue studs season now i guess,
i sometimes hardly remember that its there.
bought skittles to keep me company,
half of which lost to the birthday boy mr sanjay.
i got the mission of the day after: a delivery!
heeh, to the office 2 blocks down.
by the time i got back, there was news that someone from the next building just committed suicide.
yikes!
mum picked me up at 6 and it was home sweeeeeeeeet home.

and friday is pretty much, mundane.
i hope things picks up! my reporting bosses are all outta town.
someone PLEASE give me something to do.
england vs south africa tonight, weepiee


i'm looking forward to my weekend.

wywh

and as always, you make my day.
triple frown divided by two.
plus the still swollen and now red right eye.
you're right, about everything,
and thats just something i'm going to accept.
yes i'm the hopeless romantic who wants the upside down frown,
every single single day.
you're my favorite big red dog.




'wish you were here'

heartphuck

my right eye is so swollen and stinging since i woke up,
just suddenly,
i dont know why or how.
so im struggling to open it

and i'm feeling so in a rut right now,
in a euphoria of insecurities, frustration and upsetness.
i really wish i can believe it when people tell me i deserve to be treated better,
but i just cannot cope alone, so i just keep coming back,
even though i know i cannot rely on you.
i want to be treated better.
but you don't always get what you want.
there's just too many questions floating around in my head,
that i just want to scream into my pillow just thinking about it.
i dont know anything when it comes to you.

i allow all this to happen to me.
and its what you do to me.
i just want to be left alone,
but comfort on a shoulder would be nice.

i need to get my life pieces back together.

drastic times

sometimes the anchor around my ankles just gets too heavy,
where i feel, everything's empty.
my mind's nothing less then a whirlwind clutter,
and things/ people around me just don't help.

i just have to get away.
i need a change.

change can be good i guess,
in moderation.
and when was the last time i did something for the first time?
i just needed my mind to focus on something else,
anything but the here and now.

so drastic times calls for drastic measures,
or drastic change.
my new mechanism of coping,
other then the usual running away and avoiding everything,
coz i know, it comes back to get you.


it didnt even hurt tho, i'm still speaking normally.

i have a feeling now, i'm thriving on impulses,
and i'll just wait for repocussions.
i've got nothing to lose.

on a lighter note,
went to the hospital to visit fizah,
and her newborn baby girl.
she's such a doll.
pictures soon,
along with my overdue updates.


i need to be found, i swear.

steph's saturday!

so saturday.
an eventful day, kinda.
i spent the whole day being out in the same chillax outfit;
shorts, slippers, and some stupid brown striped polo top.
and i opted for sunnies over my beloved yellow umbrella (eh eh eh)
and yes, it poured the whole day. PFFT.

started the day at 8,
in school by 10 for the internship launch.
waste of time if you ask me.
melissa made me a cupcake, me li-ke.
i know you li-ke too.
off to lunch with muna, haha, and pika.
han's sucked! the one at tampines is really bad.
it was nice talking to the girls,
over stupid stuff, and drunkard moments.
2 of em left, it was muna and i.
so we wasted about 2 hours walking through the malls,
before we headed to shimo's to head to YCK for the bucks vs bedok kings game.
went to buy beers, and they wanted to check our ids.
(what the?!)

got over to shimo's but we were still early,
so we played "go fish" on the elmo cards.
god i suck at these kiddy games.
*'L' over the forehead*
hannan was done in school, so we walked down and hopped into his car.
and we never made it to the game,
coz we got involved into a car accident.
thank god it wasnt that bad.
it was like a pendulium of 4 cars, us being #2.
#1 stopped too abruptly, so #2 had to too,
barely touching each other.
car #3 on the other hand went BISH straight into us,
so hard the boot popped open, and his whole bumper and what not, was totalled.
car #4 just played bumper cars with us.
back and forth with multiple impacts.
held up, and muna and i needed to pee.
car got towed to the workshop, we met the couple there.
after everything was settled, we cabbed back to shimo's to get her mum's car to drive out.

met hadi at YCK and watched the blacks vs scc match.
wasnt too interested in watching them play, but whatever.
we tried to hook muna and hadi up,
but poor boy just wasnt in the mood.
*tickles his chin*

went to beach road after for some food.
which was too spicy for me at that time! :S
headed to molly's to meet up with the girls,
who told me to get out of my hole,
coz i was sooo darn short compared to them in heels.
hopped around to bq, and back,
and to bb's with kami and pia, with carmel popping by.
then to chinaone. where i had a hella time!
i think i must've bumped my head or something.
coz on any other ordinary day,
i don't think i'd actually do something like that.
but it sure gave me a good laugh,even throughout the hangover day.


tagged by the 'bucks women's rugby'
and my name and number along with it :)



pia couldnt stop laughing.
neither could i.


and i'm done. look casual.
so guys, try not to get drunk when i'm around.

and this whole time, there was a dude in hat that watched me from afar,
arms folded, watching this monkey marking out her meat,
all he needed was a popcorn box in hand.

soon after, one of the bucks boys i think had too much to drink,
he abruptly brushed passed us, and plonked on a chair,
and started puking.
MAN DOWN!
so being the good simaritan that i think i am,
i petted him on the back hopeing he'll feel better,
but he was flinging his arms around randomly,
almost telling me he just wanted to puke discretely.
er, OKAY.
i didnt even realise he was puking on his pants.
and i was so brave to tell the manager and bouncer to go away. HA.
the manager returned, only to ask if i've dropped my phone.
OMG yes *blush* phew.
he was brought out by some of the boys.
low and behold, the same fella with folded arms was there,
watching me.
i bet he was thinking "gosh this girl likes her men PISSED DRUNK"
LOL.
it was pretty funny to admit.
pia left, so i spoke to him awhile,
trying to assure him that NO i do not 'attack' drunks.

headed to MOS to meet up with marli and the rest.
the bartender asked me if i wanted 'something extra' for my drink coupon.
and he came back with a lychee martini for me.
you're the shizzles!
next one was the same,
and i remember kissing him on his hand, HA!
but i hate those martini glasses, especially when you're tipsy, like happy high.
coz i swear, my toes drank more then i did.
saw albert, just as i was leaving.

i was too zonked by the time i got home.
god.
thus the motto,
"keep holy the hangover day"
wasnt that hungover, surprisingly,
but i was just too sleep deprived! :(


i miss you, booboo face.